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Medical Breakthrough

This morning it was time to varnish wraps. This rod is for a very good friend.  When I varnish, I like warm varnish. When mixed with thinner it really flows and soaks in.

I have just moved into my new shop and everything seems new. Not much is in the same place and some things were thrown away during the move to be replaced when the time came for the new shop. One of the things I threw away was an old microwave oven that had become totally unreliable. The nice thing about that oven was it was 1000 wts and had a digital timer. No big deal I know, but was easy to use for warming varnish. Just punch in 37 seconds and the varnish was the prefect temp...if it worked at all.

This morning I tried my new oven. It has a funky dial to set the time. I have noticed that it takes longer to cook my mac and cheese than the old one so when I set the bottle of varnish in the oven I tried to set it for less than 45 seconds. That's an eyeball thing trying to set it 3/4's of the way to the first mark.

Anyway, when the oven dinged, I opened the door and saw the varnish bubbling in the bottle. "Damn, that might have been a little too long." What I didn't see was that the varnish had boiled over the top of the jar. I reached in and grabbed the bottle. Instant, searing pain.

I managed to set the bottle down on a paper towel but I was already screaming like a little girl. I ran to the sink and rinsed off with cold water but my fingertips were coated with varnish. The water was sealed out from whatever skin remained on my thumb and two fingers.

As I stood there at the sink for about two minutes, it dawned on me that there was probably varnish too thin to see on the carousel in the oven. That needed to be cleaned up RIGHT NOW! I tried to pull off a couple of paper towels to wipe with and started cleaning. The boiling varnish soaked through the paper. Now my palm was burned and I ran back to the sink. Two more minutes go by and I'm wishing I had a beer. I run back out to the shop to get a beer from the tapper, still screaming like a girl. I mean...SH!T it hurt! That boiling varnish simply had bonded to my hand meat! The skin was already bubbling up but was coated with a nice fresh coat of Epiphanes. I ran back into the house with a fresh beer and shoved my hand back underwater. While I held the beer between my hip and the kitchen counter I twisted off the cap with my left hand and started sucking down the swill.  By the time the beer was done, the bottle of varnish had cooled enough to hold it with a paper towel wrapped around the jar. The varnish was still freakin' hot and I ran from the house to the shop hopping like a dog that just got beat.

The varnish made it to the bench and I ran to the sink in the shop and shoved it underwater again.

I opened the last beer in the tapper and sat down to get a coat of varnish on the wraps.  I noticed that the brush would not come loose from my varnish covered burns and had to be pried off my right hand. Varnished wraps done and so was the beer.

I grabbed my keys and drove to the general store. As I dodged the dogs going out the drive, I noticed that my hand didn't hurt so bad anymore. I looked at my hand and the burned areas were very dark and still a little sticky. By the time I left the store, I noticed that the blisters were no longer bubbled up as a water filled reservoir waiting to burst and had a nice hard covering over them.

Now, three hours later, I can sit here and type this letter. Even though the burned areas are black, there is little pain and the blisters are gone. It's just firm smooth, black varnished skin and I think...maybe ... it's a medical breakthrough!  (Mike Shay)

    You and Nunley, what a pair!  (Larry Puckett)

    What kind of beer did you drink?  (Mike Canazon)

      Now that's the most important question.  Homebrew, Microbrew, or normal commercial swill?  (Mark Wendt)

    Medical Breakthrough????  Sound more like a chemical breakthrough to me as those fumes sure sound potent!!  (Larry Tusoni)

    I am glad to hear things are going better for you in Congress AZ. then in So. Ca. At least this time there wasn’t blood squirting all over your shop. Oh, and by the way there was a technological breakthrough about 6000 years ago for removing things from an oven, they are called tongs. Thought I would just let you know in case you had not heard of them  :)   (Adam Vigil)

    What we actually have here is a religio/legal atavism. Don't any of  you guys remember the stories of trial by ordeal during the middle ages?

    An accused person who denied the crime was forced to pick up a red hot cast iron ball. His hand was then bandaged, and the dressing was left in place for some time. If the wound
    festered, the guy was guilty and got a worse punishment.  If the hand healed cleanly the guy was innocent and and sent home with a "Dominus Vobiscum".

    Hey Mike, your hand might hurt a lot when the beer wears off, but cheer up, you must be a righteous guy. Keep your hand well varnished for a while, however, just in case. :^)   (Tom Smithwick)

    Thanks to all of you who told me to go see a doctor.  I have never felt so loved.  I love all of you too!  (Mike Shay)

    PS: in a rodmakers kind of way!

      Oh Mike ... if you'd only get a cowboy haircut you'd really feel 'loved' by some of the locals <G>

      Save your trip to the doctor for your first snake bite <G>  (Ron Hossack)

        My thoughts exactly.  (Mike Shay)

          A breakthrough that only cures the disease that it caused is questionable. Was that a good stout dark beer? That may have been the true remedy. (Henry Mitchell)

            You could have held the cold beer in the burnt hand. Then you wouldn't have had to keep running to the kitchen sink for cold water.  (Jim Tefft)

            Are you sure you didn't grab a bottle of Fultz's TruBlu instead of the bud?  That stuff will do a lot more than oxidize ferrules.  Didn't you see Jeff's presentation at CRR?  I've got a picture of Jeff and Ralph Moon(shine?) sharing some of that dark stout.  Where were you?  (Mike Canazon)

      To H with the doctors, they'll just clean out your beer money stash, get more beer instead, the hand will heal eventually.  (John Channer)

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